I want to begin with something that might be frustrating to hear: the thing most mothers think they need is not the thing that will actually help them. What most exhausted mothers think they need is a break. A few days away. Uninterrupted sleep. Some time when no one needs...
The question that almost every mother I work with has asked at some point, usually with a combination of frustration and quiet defeat. You went to bed at a reasonable time. The house was quiet. You slept — or something resembling sleep — for seven, eight, maybe even nine hours....
She had a husband who loved her. Three children who needed her constantly. A full social calendar, a job she cared about, a house that was never quiet. And she was one of the loneliest people I had ever spoken to. Not lonely in the way that isolation produces loneliness...
There is a word I want to introduce you to. It is not widely known outside of research circles and the small but growing community of people talking honestly about the full experience of becoming a mother. The word is matrescence. It was coined by medical anthropologist Dana Raphael in...
Why the Weight Won't Move No Matter What You Try — A Physician's Honest Explanation She was tracking every meal. She had been for four months. She was exercising four times a week — something she had not managed to do consistently since before her children were born, and she...
I want to talk about the anger. Not the anger you are comfortable admitting to — the justified kind, directed at systems that fail mothers, at inequitable partnerships, at a culture that demands everything and offers almost nothing in return. I want to talk about the other anger. The kind...
I want to start with a question no one ever asks at a doctor's visit. Not "how many hours of sleep are you getting?" Not "what does your diet look like?" Not even "how are you feeling emotionally?" — though that one is rare enough. The question I want to...
She runs a tight ship. Her calendar is color-coded. Her children are on time to their activities. She answers emails within the hour. She remembers everyone's preferences, dietary restrictions, social anxieties, and upcoming events. She anticipates problems before they materialize and has usually already solved them by the time anyone...
Your Labs Are Normal. Your Doctor Said You're Fine. So Why Don't You Feel Fine? Let me tell you about a pattern I have seen so many times that I could describe it before the mother in front of me finishes her sentence. She has been tired for two years....
I want to tell you about the morning I knew something had to change. It was few years ago . It was a Tuesday. My alarm went off at 5:45 a.m. I had slept seven hours a decent night by any standard and yet when I opened my eyes,...
